You're so complex!!!

Complex noun phrases can be very complex indeed, especially when they have different embedded elements and even more when the sentence in which they appear is long itself. This will be a competition, the one who comes up with the longest sentence (and analyse noun phrases correclty) will be the winner. Academic writing is probably the best source.

OUT-OF-ORDER WORD ORDER

Here's an extract from The Penelopiad by Margaret Atwood (you may have noticed by now she's my favourite writer =)). Identify variations in the word order structure:
It's a low art, tale-telling.
Patient, they used to call me.
It is to this episode, or rather to my
knowledge of it, that I attribute
my reserve, as well as my mistrust of
other people's intentions.
I know it isn't me they are after,
not Penelope the Duck.
It is true that I sometimes doubted
their existence, these gods.
But during my lifetime I considered
it prudent not to take any risks.

Adjectivous Adjectives

Fashion magazines are great to find that many words together can become a compound adjective as long as they are hyphenated. Here are some examples from Cosmopolitan:
"200 make-you-sexy swimsuits"
"fake-tan goodies: it's all about an I-can't-believe-it's-real-Mediterranean glow"
"it's nearly time for seduce-him shorts, tease-him tops, babe-licious bikinis"


Margaret Atwood uses a lot of these constructions in her short story "Hairball" and the effect is great. Some examples from this story:
"drop-dead stare"
"an agressive touch-me-if-you-dare suede outfit"
"a lick-my-neck silk shirt open at the throat"

If you happen to come across similar examples, share them with us.

Grammar is sweet!

James Hurford, author of "Grammar- A Student's Guide" (Cambridge UP 1994) has wittily dedicated this book:

"For Sue N. Davis,
superlative, perfect, proper,
active, positive, agreeable relative"

I wish I had thought of that dedication myself! (I wish I could write a book on grammar, too)
1- Think of what each word refers to.
2- Write a dedication using other grammar words. (Come on, it cannot be that difficult! I will try myself)

Sing standard English, man!

Songs are a great tool in the EFL classroom, all teachers know that. My point here is that they are great because they help our students resist our deep-rooted obssessive tendency to demand correct use of English when native speakers hardly speak "correctly" (in traditional prescriptive terms) at all.

Here are some examples (they may sound old-fashioned to you but you will surely provide up-dated examples of your own favourite bands). Comment on the forms that would surely be criticised by prescriptive grammarians:

Bob Marley: "no woman no cry"
Rolling Stones: "all the dreams we held so close seemed to all go up in smoke
Tracy Chapman: "I got no plans I ain't going nowhere" "You got a fast car
And I got a plan to get us out of here" "I been working at the convenience store"
"You see my old man's got a problem //He live with the bottle that's the way it is"
The Beatles: "when I'm home, feeling you holding me tight, tight"

Grammar is fun

What do you call Santa's Helpers?
Subordinate clauses!

What does Santa call his wife at tax time?
A dependent Claus

Why did Cinderella's soccer team always lose?

Because her coach was a pumpkin

Describe the processes involved in the words that make these jokes possible.

THE TRAIN TO OXFORD (a good example of how to avoid wasting words!)

This dialogue is a good example of the process of ELLIPSIS. It was originally assigned as an excercise to show the importance of intonation to convey meaning but I find it interesting also for you to supply what has been left out in the process of ellipsis; you will need to punctuate accordingly too. (source: English course for teachers, Bath, England 2000; not done by me!)

A: Um cigarette

B: Thanks

A: Oxford

B: Yes you

A: Um that's right student

B: Nurse you

A: Unemployed

B: Long

A: A year er married

B: Divorced

A: Really me too

B: Kids

A: One you

B: Three

A: Erm dinner

B: When

A: Tonight

B: Ah busy tomorrow

A: Lunch

B: OK where

A: Um Browns

B: Browns

A: When

B: One

A: Fine Oh Oxford

B: Already

A: Tomorrow

B: Tomorrow

A: Oh

B: Yes

A: Name

B: Sarah

A: Andrew